My Redeeming Love

I have recently read Redeeming Love by Francine Rivers and what a great book it is. I'm sure most people would compare themselves to either Michael or Angel.... but me, I compare myself to Paul. In the book, Paul is Michael's brother-in-law. After trying to pan for gold in the mountains, he comes back to the valley and finds that Michael has married a former prostitute from Pair-a-dice. He hates Angel from the moment he laid eyes on her. He always sought to bring her down with his words, actions, and even using her as a form of "payment". As another family moves into the valley, Paul finds himself falling in love with the eldest daughter, Miriam, and convinced himself that he wasn't the right one for her. Michael was, even though he is already married. In the end, as he's planning on moving away. Miriam comes to him and offers herself to Paul so that he will realize that she loves him and wants to marry him and not Michael. As Angel has run away for the final time, Miriam persudaes Paul to go in search of Angel and bring her back. Since he hates Angel, he tries to think of stories to tell Miriam so he really wouldn't have to look too hard. He actually finds Angel, thinking she had gone back to prostitution, and finds out that not only has she done well for herself, she is also helping others who want to get out of that life style. He finds out that he was completely wrong about her and finds that everyone was right about her. That being mad, and cruel, and hateful to Angel was totally in the wrong for him.

I say all that to say this. I am like that. As much as I want to see that good in people, I tend to see their past and want to criticize them for it, not giving them a fair chance to be who God has intended for them to be. Also, it seems like every guy that I've ever liked, I've basically thrown it away because I believe that I am not good enough. I'm just not good enough. Why do I keep telling myself that. I have probably missed out on a lot of great friendships and possibly finding the one that God has for me. I'm not saying I have because I'm not God and I don't know everything, but I can pray for my future husband, where ever he is. As to criticizing others and trying to tear others doen when I should be building them up, this is something I really need to work on. I can give you a couple of examples of times that I have been like that. I can't say simply because I don't want to pin point anyone out.

God, please help me be more like You. Help me realize that no matter what a person's past is, You love them as much as You love me. Help me remember that they are Your children too. Grant me patience and wisdom. I love You and I ask these in Your name, Amen.

I can't believe what I just saw....

I was on facebook and one of the first things I read was (not putting name in on purpose) "So and So said that an unborn child is a dreamkiller. Right on M. So. Right on." Wow.... What has this world come to? I feel like crying. Isn't it our job to proctect the unborn? It's not their fault that 2 people have to have such lustful feelings outside of marriage. That unborn child is as innocent as it can be. I can't stress enough how sick that makes me.

Shake It Up......

sometimes i wonder why in the world does God allow bad things to happen to godly people. i know the answer is to not only to bring His child closer to Him, but also to test them to see how well they can handle the situation. i'm there now. i know that what i'm going through seems so hard right now, but i know it'll be better in the long run. God brings people into your life for certain reasons just as He takes people out of it. normally i hate it when He takes people out of my life but right now, i'm rather relieved. i'm not naming any names so no one will know who i'm talking about (unless it's one involved). it's been a hectic past few years and i am at my wits end...... i don't know what to do..... i try not to let it get to me but in the end it always tries to slip in..... i wish i coud just erase the past out of my head. yeah well, i know that's practically impossible. why does everything have to be so complicated?

on a lighter note, i get to see my 5 year olds tomorrow!!! i haven't seen them in 2 weeks.... i don't want this awana year to end... why can't this year go on forever?? :)

Come with me and you'll be in a world of pure imagination

i want to do something great with my life. i want my life to count. i want people to look at my life and know that i did the best i could and lived under the shadow of the Almighty. People will look and say that my life glorified God. 2011 is a brand new year and i am excited to say that things are going to change. it's 2011 and i have no resolutions.... i have goals and these goals are totally reachable. all i have to do is stay comitted and not give up. if you want to know what they are, you'll have to figure it out or just wait for the changes.... they're coming....

Nicaragua Bound

Ok, so it's 10:58 right now, I can't sleep, and I have to be at the church at 2:45 to start traveling for Nicaragua! :) I am so blessed to be able to go on this trip. I had no idea where on earth the money was going to come from or how I was going to be able to take a week off work. But let me tell you, God always works things out for good. I prayed and prayed and prayed and sent out letters (Did I mention I prayed??) and I seemed to have no luck in getting the money I needed. I thought to myself on numerous occasions, 'Am I not supposed to go on this trip? If I am, I need to trust that God will provide for me.' Guess what? HE DID! As of 2 and a half weeks ago, I owed $1285 toward my trip and God sent a blessing my way that paid $1280 of what I owed. I only had $5 left..... how awesome is that?? So, now I am ready to go. God is going to do some amazing things on this trip. I can't wait to see what He plans to teach me while I'm there. I will definitely post when I get back! Don't forget to pray!!

Love Never Fails

"Love suffers long and is kind; love does not envy; love does not parade itself, is not puffed up; love does ot behave rudely, does not seek its own, is not provoked, thinks no evil; does not rejoice in iniquty, but rejoices in the truth; bears all things, believes all things, hopes all things, endures all things. Love Never Fails."

1 Corinthians 13:4-8a

The greatest love that the world has ever known is Jesus and yet, people turn their backs on Him. God knew this would happen. He knew that when He gave His only Son, that the world would reject Him. It saddens my heart to see people who are hurting, people who are in desperate need of love and yet have no idea of the greatest love that they can and will ever know. The Bible commands us to go and share with our fellow man.... Acts 1:8 says we are to be witnesses to Jerusalem, Judea, Samaria, and the ends of the earth. How will people ever know if no one will go to them. It kills me to think that there are millions of people who have NEVER heard the name of Jesus, and yet here we are in glorious America hearing the name of Christ everyday. Now, don't get me wrong. I know that there are people here in America that probably have never heard of Him, but think about the greater chance they have to hear than people groups who appear to be unreachable. Many countries do not even allow Christianity to be preached. I have peace in the fact that one day, every knee shall bow and every tongue will confess that Jesus is Lord, but it does break my heart that many will not be ready.


'God I pray that, in Your mighty name, people groups all over this world will come to know You as Savior. I pray that You would move in and through people as You call many to be Your hands and feet as you have commanded us to go and make disciples. May You be glorified in everything and may You be exalted high above the heavens. No one else is worthy enough to accept our worship and our praise. Be lifted up and magnified, most gracious Heavenly Father. In Your Son's most precious and holy name, the Name about all names, Amen."

Ignorance - Paramore

If I'm a bad person you don't like me, well I guess I'll make my own way. It's a circle, I mean cycle, I can't excite you anymore. Where's your gavel, your jury. What's my offense this time? You're not a judge but if you're gunna judge me, sentence me to another life. Don't wanna hear your sad songs, I don't wanna feel your pain. When you swear it's all my fault cause you know we're not the same. We're not the same. No, we're not the same. The friends who stuck together, we wrote our names in blood, but I guess you can't accept that the change is good. It's good. It's good. YOU TREAT ME JUST LIKE ANOTHER STRANGER WELL IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU SIR I GUESS I'LL GO I BEST BE ON MY WAY OUT. ignorance is your new best friend. This is the best thing that could have happened any longer and I wouldn't have it. It's not a war no, it's NOT A RAPTURE I'm just a person but you can't take it. The same tricks that once fooled me, they won't get you anywhere. I'm not the same kid from your memory. Now I can fend for myself. Don't wanna hear your sad song, I don't wanna feel your pain. When you swear it's all my fault cause you know we're not the same. We're not the same. No, we're not the same. Yeah, we used to stick together, we wrote our names in blood, but I guess you can't accept that the change is good. It's good. It's good! YOU TREAT ME JUST LIKE ANOTHER STRANGER WELL IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU SIR I GUESS I'LL GO I BEST BE ON MY WAY OUT. ignorance is your new best friend.

YOU TREAT ME JUST LIKE ANOTHER STRANGER WELL IT'S NICE TO MEET YOU SIR I GUESS I'LL GO

I BEST BE ON MY WAY OUT.